Tuesday, October 30, 2007


I need to get fitted for a bra one of these days. I wish I could get up the nerve. And I've got to figure out where to go, what's reputable.

/end transmission

Monday, October 29, 2007


So. Just how the heck am I going to pay for my second half of my two years of college tuition? Holy cow. I'm looking at two in-state colleges and I'm just overwhelmed by the prices. This sucks.

Well, here's hoping I might talk to both colleges and maybe there'll be some things that will help me out. I dunno.

I'm also trying to figure out what to do. I will just have to flat out admit this... I am not continuing in math. That's kinda sad on my part, but it's what has to be for now. I don't know what exactly happened, as I always had the highest grade in math. I was not prepared for this math course I'm taking right now and it's hurting me.
My plans are to perhaps come back to a math degree sometime in the future, when there's not so much pressure for me to finish college and get a job. (like I'll take one class per semester after work type deal.)

ANYWHO... It's looking like I probably will major in Geography (the physical/GIS aspect of it) once I become a junior.
I think I'll go ahead and finish my Associate's of Science degree... what I'll probably take for the spring semester is geography, history and physics.
Then when I transfer to a 4 year university, I'll switch to a BA.

Good times will be had by all.


Saturday, October 27, 2007

It bugs me

You know... thanks to a homestate team being in the World Series, the Rockies, everybody is suddenly all about baseball and the world series. It's a state fever thing. That's cool. But it's interesting these people wouldn't pay $8 to see them before but now they're willing to pay <$150.

What I really hate is the scalping and money grubbers. I had a girl in my astronomy class brag about how she got tickets and she only got 2, and then she whined about how upset she is she wasn't thinking clearly and didn't get 4 so she could sell the other 2 for a tidy profit.

That's what bugs the crap out of me. Call me a socialist... but I think it's just plain rude that she gets to buy the tickets for, say, $150 a piece, but now if someone else wants to go they have to pay whatever mark-up she desires on it.

It's a 2 way street though. Basically this kind of crap can only stop if people would stop buying the price-gouged tickets.

It's just a disgusting way of humankind.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

status epilepticus

That is just a weird term. My husband and I went to a doctor's appointment today and I just couldn't bring myself to say it. Because I always feel like I would be saying it wrong. (it's when a person goes into seizure after seizure and they don't stop.)

I also dicked it up in astronomy today. I swear. I could've gotten 10 extra credit points if I would've answered a question. Why didn't I? Stupid little anxiety attack. I just couldn't bring myself to say the answer for whatever reason. (I don't need the points, luckily. But it's the principle of the matter. Darn me to heck anyway.)

I had my drama exam in Lit. I just don't know... I really don't. I'm afraid I did very badly. This semester is just hell on me for some reason. Grrrrr.

Anyways, we're trying a new medicine on Ryan. He actually went into status epilepticus on this one medicine about 16 years ago, Te.gretol. Now we are trying a drug that is close to it, like a cousin, Tri.leptal. It'll be interesting (right) to see what happens. I hate it when we mess around with his medication, but we simply have to. I keep waiting for that one drug that will answer our prayers. (or cocktail of drugs, whatever.)

I asked Ryan when his status epilepticus happened when he was on that other medicine and he said he was about 4 days into the dose. He just took his first dose of this medicine tonight. Hopefully next week will pass by uneventfully.

Yay to Blooger for finally putting in an option to email, or subscribe, to comments!!!!

Tuesday, October 23, 2007


Ummm... hmmm. I just tried to figure out how to have site feeds on This Old Blooger.

How the heck do I do this? I just spent a half hour trying to figure it out, and I can't. I enabled site feeds in my settings, but as for putting a link or whatever on my sidebar, I cannot get it to do that. I went to template tags here on Blooger, and the code they gave me doesn't work.

Nuts to this. >:-(

me and my imaginary friends

Did I ever say the results of a math test? I think I did... but for our second big trig test I got a big fat D. I'm so excited. It's my first D ever. I should frame the damn thing.
However it must be noted that over half the class flat out failed the test. 8 F's. It was a very difficult and painful chapter and test.

This next chapter is going a bit better for me now. It's about the laws of sines and cosines... the dot product... imaginary numbers - trig functions or something or other with z... anyways. It's getting better. Although the word problems are a massive b*tch. I mean, wow, massive.

I am so counting down this semester. I kinda like being a math tutor, but at the same time I kinda hate it too. I hope that next semester I can manage to get away with only doing 6 hours a week of tutoring. I don't know. I'm not enjoying this semester very much. Some factors are a location I'm at, and the people with which I am surrounded. (very broad, general whine, huh?)

Switching gears - it's interesting. I had my hair cut about a week ago. It's a new change for me. One I never thought I would embrace. For most of my life I was all about the loooong hair. I loved long hair and couldn't imagine ever wanting short hair. But I have a bob-like cut in my hair, and it is well above my shoulders. I love it.

I like the change this brings about. Growth and evolution on my part. I know it's only hair, but still. It's nice to know you aren't stagnant. It's still kinda baffling to me that I could like short hair.

Hmmm, I just basically had a brain fart and can't remember anything else I was going to say. Guess it'll have to wait for another post!

Friday, October 19, 2007

Not necessarily life and death

Odd. Out of boredom, I decided to look in on an old email account. This one has a little bit of reason for me looking... it was an account that I used to communicate with an ex-best friend. I hate that I still miss him from time to time, especially due to the way he's treated me. It was bad, and I'm better off without him. So why do I still miss him? Grrr.

I digress.

The point is, it's interesting to re-read old messages from your past and seeing your thoughts and feelings about things. I know these things were important to me at the time, but at the same time, who really cares??? I'm getting better about not being so... nitpicky about every minutae of my life.

It also sucks that the one message I really got into re-reading was so long that it got cut off with this: ===message truncated===
Ah phooey!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Patience is a... you know...

I have a story. A real story I can share that is kinda neat.

Ok. So I stopped at the grocery store after school, on my way home. Then I got behind some ladies that were doing things with their method of payment that took a long time. I believe the cashier was relatively new too, but not a total newbie. Just doing a job that she probably saw once briefly in training and had to think how to process it since it doesn't come up often.

I don't even know what it was they were doing... I guessed some kind of government help or something.

So. For the first few moments I was kinda like "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon. How long is this going to take?" In my head of course.

Then I told myself "Calm down. Patience. The world needs patience. These kind of things happen. People need for others not to be so damn rude and pushy all the time. And what is the rush we are always in? Good grief."

I will admit... about 5 minutes later I was still fighting with myself to be patient. I couldn't really go to another line because I had already unloaded my stuff. So I just stuck it out some more.

When it was all finally said and done, the cashier apologized to me. She looked like frazzled. I told her I completely understand, these things happen. I really am understanding about it.
One of the two ladies, the customers, came back and thanked me as well for my patience. Kinda dumbstricken by this, I said "It's ok, not a problem!!" I flashed through a couple of quick chit-chatty things I could say, but discarded them. Something like "The world needs more patience." or "We all have situations like this from time to time."

Only once I got into the parking lot did I think of the tired, but true "Patience is a virtue" thing.


I felt kinda guilty though. Because, well... I was getting a little bit grumpy about how long it was taking. And I was fighting with myself to be patient. (how terrible is that? I hate that. This world needs patience and time! Man, where's the fire all the time?)

And just how sweet was it for these two ladies to thank me for my patience? I mean, wow. For the universe to reward a person, to show a good side, to prove itself unpredictable...


Quite a thought provoker.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

I'm going to sound petty...

But wow some people are so dense. Or they just don't bother to read. It's so aggravating.

In other "news",
I think... I need to really figure out... how to go away for college.
Here are my options.
1) Stay living with my parents and go to a local university. Of which I'm not exactly enamored with, and it's a little expensive.

2) Figure out how me, as a full time student, and my husband who is disabled and on disability which doesn't pay anything worthwhile, can live on our own. In another town.

I think, for our sanity, I need to find a way for us to be on our own. Somehow, someway.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

I wanna bury my nut!

This morning as I walked out to my car to go to school, I had to pause and watch something so darn cute and amusing.

I watched a squirrel trying to bury a nut in our neighbor's astro turf.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

bah humbug

I just don't know what to say. I'm really in over my head with this stupid math class. The college really did me a great disservice (whatever spelling) by having me go into this class. I was a straight A math student before now. This is completely ridiculous.

There's not much I can do but keep working hard. I'm so frustrated and upset though. I really think I failed my first math test. I mean really. I couldn't answer a lot of questions. Frankly, a lot of other students were struggling too.

Anyways. I'm really poking my nose into a major in geography. I feel like that actually may be right for me. After I have explored soooooo many other majors. I'm going to request a meeting with the head of geography at our school, and maybe I can get some really good insight.

I feel oddly quiet from journaling. I don't know why. Interesting. Oh well.

Anything fun I can tell you? Nope. Not really. SOSDD basically.
And I have been doing totally awful on my weight loss efforts. Stress is just killing me.

Saturday, October 6, 2007

6 days ago

You know, I never really did mention much about our day out last Sunday. Maybe I'll rehash a few fun details now.

I love the zoo, but hate seeing these poor animals in awful cages. They try to update some of them, and a few are better, but still. Poor darlings. Still, I had a great time. Weather was nice, even though the sun was shining brightly. I love spending a lot of time near the aquatic animals and such. We watched the sea lions for a long time, the river otters... so on.

Anyways, then we popped over to an old friend's house, Fred. I've known him for 15 years now. We're not super close or anything, but despite distance we seem to keep in touch with each other decently enough. We invited him to go to Casa Bonita's with us, but he had other plans with other friends. So we chatted for awhile and then Ryan and I had to get going to the restaurant.

Same as I remember! The food wasn't as terrible as it's made out to be. It's not great, but not the worst mexican food I've ever eaten either. After eating, we explored the restaurant. Ryan had a really, really good time, like I knew he would. They did have divers there, but sadly they were women. ;-) I was astonished, though, at how they have to climb up the waterfall. These poor people have to literally scale the walls. Scary! Goodness! And even after they dive into the pool, there's no ladder to get out, they have again climb up the walls and over a fence. It's soooo odd. The pool is so tiny. I wonder how many accidents there have been?

Ryan really didn't want to leave. I knew that would happen. ;-) Oh, and we went through Bart's Cave... the thing is they have it all "Halloween-ed". So that just makes it even scarier!!! I'm a huuuuge baby when it comes to things like this. The only reason I could go through Bart's Cave in the first place was because I ran through there countless times when I was little and finally got a little desensitized to the scariness of it. I do have to pat myself on the back, because I really am a scaredy cat, but yet I managed to go through. I saw lots of other people back out. They'd walk up to the entrance, turn around and walk right back out. LOL. I just about did that as well, but I pushed through.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

urge to kill - rising

Good grief. When will I learn? After a little hiatus, I peeked back into my old blog service... and here I am with sky high blood pressure. Man, there are times when I wish you could throw a website or something into the trash. Especially if you're weak like me and keep going back for more.

Sad thing is, I think the other service is a bit better than this one. More bells and whistles and interactions. It's like I have this choice of "Live in the mountains nary a soul within 300 miles" or "Live in the sewer of the Big Apple city."
I truly don't know what to do.

The internet on a whole can be a pain in the tuckus though. I see so many blogs where the author has to carefully craft their words so they don't incur wrath of maggots. LOL. Maggot wrath. How funny. Or they have to put in all these stipulations to try and qualm the onset of two-teethed people playing banjos with their feet.

I don't know. Why the heck am I even doing this? Well, the sad thing is... I do it for interaction. I have barely any real life friends. I do love to type and write out my words. Why don't I just keep it private then? I don't know. Part of me really likes the opinions of others, but only when they're said in a respectful, constructive manner.

I have joined my local chapter of meet up dot com. I have yet to attend something. I probably should. I have really tried to think of ways to gain new friends in my personal life, and it's not easy. Not easy at all. :-(

Life and the internet are kinda like getting shot in the butt from a doctor. It can be much easier to take with a lollipop. Right now I have no lollipops in my life.

I should become Shannon Unplugged. I know. But then I'd really feel lonely and isolated.

Clearly... I am quite conflicted about my feelings. Well, time to stop rambling.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007


Well, we had fun on Sunday.
I got an 84% on my math test. So that's decent. Not my usual good work... but... I'm just happy I didn't get a D or F or even a C.

I'm finding out that I probably should have just taken the real trigonometry course. Then I could've gone into calculus with no problems. Instead of taking this stupid "hybrid" course that's supposed to help prepare me for calculus. It just sucks every trig function you can imagine. *sigh*
I hate this class.

In other news, I got a 106% on my astronomy test. And a "B++" on my lit test. I'm not too worried about that, she just wants to see us improve over the course, and so yeah... I can improve myself into an A.

Well anyways.
Basically SOSDD.

I had a crappy tutoring day today. I just couldn't help anybody. Gah. Although I did get 2 kids to learn how to program the quadratic formula into their calculators so there's that victory I suppose. But my stupid math class about killed my brain this morning. I'm so wigged out. More hard work ahead of me over the weekend.